Dealing with Anxiety and Self-Doubt

I completely missed Tuesday’s post even though I committed to a post every week in the beginning.  The reason being was that I ended up gaining 2 lbs this week and it hit me harder than I thought it would.  I realize that it’s probably due to gaining muscle mass but it’s difficult to rationalize that.  I’ve still been keeping up with the Hero’s Journey though.  Earlier in the week I even decided to move up to level 2 for some of the days.  Upper body days with push ups are still giving me a hard time so those I’ll still do at level 1.

I’m really proud of myself for keeping up with this.  Yes, I’ve taken rest days, but never more than 2 per week and it’s really because the summer is crazy busy.  I’ve done up to Day 15 at this point and that’s 25% of journey complete!  It doesn’t even feel like that long and I’m baffled that I’ve already moved up an intensity level.

This weekend, I won’t be doing any of Hero’s Journey however because I’m at a weekend-long family reunion camping thing.  Shower facilities are limited and I don’t want to be all stinky and sweaty for that long. I’ll be outside the entire time and doing lots of walking, so at least I won’t just be sitting on my butt the entire time.  Although I think the alcohol consumption might just counter that. Oops. (My family loves to party)

BLAUGUST

Yep, I just started blogging and decided that I’m going to do this thing.  I may be a little crazy but I’m never one to do things by halves lol  For those of you who aren’t in the loop, Blaugust is a blogging event where you’re challenged to write 31 posts in 31 days.  Essentially, one post every day for the month of August, but if you fall behind you can catch up by making 2 posts in a day.

I decided to jump on this train in the hopes that it forces me to write.  I don’t particularly enjoy writing.  My creative outlet in past was drawing but lately that hasn’t been fulfilling to me. My background is engineering so numbers are my happy place.  Technical papers? No, problem! It’s easy to explain my design or summarize findings but I’ve always had trouble putting my thoughts and opinions on paper.  I still have nightmares from having to write essays in English class.  I now realize this stems from a combination of two things: 1) Anxiety related to being terrible at writing and 2) Years of conditioning about  how there’s a “right” and “wrong” answer or way of doing things. By forcing me, or at least giving me good motivation, to post something everyday I’m hoping that writing will get easier and that it’ll work these issues out of me.  Practices makes perfect, right?

It’s only the first day of Blaugust, so there’s still time to join if you’re interested! Head over to Bel’s Blog for a list of rules and guidelines and register on the Blaugust Community Nook to join!  You’re a winner if you complete all 31 posts and a Survivor if you write at least 15.

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3 thoughts on “Dealing with Anxiety and Self-Doubt

  1. Don’t sweat it, hun. 🙂 Blogging isn’t all about the writing. That sounds weird, I know, but maybe consider it like you’re writing an email to a bunch of friends or a series of tweets. When you consider you’re just interacting with a community, it feels less stressful and takes away some of the pressure. And this is a great community!

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    1. That’s what I’m trying to do! It’s a little hard to shake off the feeling that I’m being judged though. You’re right that this community awesome. I’m feeling extremely welcomed amongst some great bloggers

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  2. For every right way of doing things, there’s also a left. It’s all a matter of perspective in which direction you take: wrongness has no hold here. I believe you’ll make it through this with all 31 posts!

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